Curious about dirty talk but don’t know why you should care.
Read why dirty talk can make hot sex even hotter here.
First things first.
Anyone who tries something new or unfamiliar is nervous, so step one is simple. Relax. You’re doing this for mutual enjoyment, so if you’re not enjoying talking dirty it might be pointless. Unless you’re into humiliation, then by all means, be uncomfortable!
Also talk about it first, some words can be uncomfortable for people. So let’s say you dive right in, and use a word that is an immediate turn off for your partner you might never want to try dirty talk again.
Dirty talk, just like sex itself, is something that needs to be calibrated to the individual that is hearing the dirty talk from their partner. So present the fact that you want to dirty talk into the bedroom and maybe talk about some off limits words or phrases. You can also ask what they like their body parts called to get the creative juices flowing. It can give you a great jumping off point, while also being really affirming to whoever your using your sexiest words on.
In general it’s a much better idea to slowly introduce dirty talk that is not “too extreme” or explicit. Start slowly and build up to the more intense stuff. Everyone is different and has different levels so talking to your partner first is important.
Keep it simple! especially when you’re starting out, you don’t have to weave intricate tales of pleasure. Turn directions like, harder/faster/slower/etc into dirty talk to start out. When you start to feel comfortable then feel free to push your limits. Just go past it, learn to get lost in it, and don’t judge yourself or withdraw. An unabashed attitude and absence of inhibition will make you one of the best sexual partners ever.
Tease Them!
Before Sex, Say What You Want – During Sex, Say What You Like. A good rule of thumb with dirty talk is to tell your partner what you want to do to them/with them before you’re doing it, and then while you’re doing it, tell them what you’re liking about it. You can also text messages of things you want to do to them to tantalize them before you’re physically together. Saying something along the lines of “I’m trying to get work done but I can’t stop thinking about….” will really make have your partner thinking about you all day long.
Be descriptive, use the 5 senses.
Take your dirty talk to the next level by moving on from simple phrases like “Yeah, I like that,” “You look so hot right now” to “I love how you taste” and “you look so hot when you’re doing….”.One of the easiest and quickest ways to boost the power and erotic, engaging quality of your dirty talk is to start using multi-sensory descriptive words. Most people dirty talk with two of their primary senses: sight and touch. Think about smell, taste, and sound as well.
Dirty Talk: Ground Floor
These are some phrases to get ideas to add to your repertoire of filth.
- That feels amazing
- Do you like that?
- I’m getting so turned on/wet/hard
- You look so beautiful/handsome/gorgeous/manly right now
- What do you feel like doing to me?
- I love how you look at me when you’re turned on
- I can’t wait to taste you on my lips
- You taste so good.
- I love what you’re doing to me right now
- I’m getting close
A little kinkier
ROLE: You’re the Top
- I know you’ve been thinking about doing/fucking/tasting me all day
- You’re getting hard thinking about touching/licking/fucking me, aren’t you?
- You’re hot, but I’m gonna make you work for this
- I know what you want, but I want you to ask/tell/beg me to give it to you
ROLE: You’re the Bottom
- I’ve been thinking about you all day
- I can’t wait to feel you against/inside me
- I love it when you look at me like that
- Oh god, I want you/this so bad
- I want you to take/fuck/use me like I’m your good girl
Dirty Talk: The Next Level
So you’ve tried all the starter ones and you’re looking for something new that drives your partner crazy. Check out the following, grab a few of your favorite phrases and see how these phrases feel incorporated them into your dirty talk.
- I love it when I can feel you squeeze around me
- Is this yours? Are you going to take it?
- You look like a sexy little (fill in the blank) with your lips wrapped around me like this
- Tell me how much you love it when I fuck you/when you fuck me
- I want you to fuck me in front of the mirror
- You have such a perfect ass/cock/pussy/body/etc.
- You taste amazing when I’m…
A little kinkier
ROLE: You’re the Top
- Tell me how good my (blank) tastes/how wet I am/how hard I’ve made your cock
- Keep going, make me come with your mouth/tongue/cock
- Look me in the eyes; I’m gonna (fill in blank) so good… but I want you to beg me for it/but if you look away I stop
- You like it? Tell me how much you love it.
ROLE: You’re the Bottom
- I want to/please can I suck your cock?
- Oh god, fuck me harder/don’t stop/give me that cock
- Fuck me (fill in the blank), use me like your dirty/filthy/good little girl.
Practice makes it easier, so start small with simple phrases and work up to the big ones. It might sound silly at first, but it comes easier after awhile. Have fun, and enjoy the journey with each other.
